Hum Experience
The sound is like nonstop bell ringing. The sound is not of
metal but glass, very sharp and its tones are so close. At night, it is
stronger because of silence. So whenever it is quiet, it rings louder. If concentrate
on it, it gets louder. Sometimes tones change and become a different frequency.
This change is very clear. Sometimes the ears are blocked by the tones
sometimes the ear is open and frequency change. That’s what I remember for now.
The Start
It started when I was still very young, about 15 in Burma . I read a
meditation article and it said the ringing can appear when the concentration
becomes stronger. And soon I noticed it happened to me. It never left me ever
since.
Emotion
First I didn’t feel bad about it. However, sometimes later
it became something serious and made me stressed. I felt like being imprisoned.
It was still bearable. It lasted until I accepted it and not resisting anymore.
I became to accept it because I had no choice but to calm my mind and control
it not to feel too bad. Now understand the two conditions of mind and I try not
to let go of my mind to the wrong side.
Physical Symptom
I always feel my ears are blocked. I have to pick the ear
web very often. When I was young, my ears were not oily. I saw my friend ear
oily and I thought it might be good and it became to happen to me. I was told
to pick the ear web when I was young. I did it often and even hurt my ears. Water
got into the ears often. It seems the shape of the ears is not water proof. Actually
I wash my head everyday and this could be the case causing water to get in. I
think my hair and ears are naturally oily.
Its Effect in My Life
Often I lose concentration when I am listening to something because
I am hearing the hum and what I’m listening to appear unclear. People sometimes
asked me to learn to listen because I appeared not listening. Yes, I was not
listening properly because I couldn’t hear properly. It’s more disturbing when
answering the phone. But I can still hear though as the hum is only
distracting. As I don’t listen much, I became to speak more and think more. And
now I usually write my ideas down.
As Meditation Object
I sometimes listen to the hum. The more attention I pay to
it, the louder it becomes. And it is also enjoyable. I think it’s good to
listen to it and use it for a good reason.
As I can't stop hearing it, now I'm hearing it in my left ear. When the environment is quiet, I can hear hum in both ears. Expensive experience.
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