Hum In My Ears

Hum Experience

The sound is like nonstop bell ringing. The sound is not of metal but glass, very sharp and its tones are so close. At night, it is stronger because of silence. So whenever it is quiet, it rings louder. If concentrate on it, it gets louder. Sometimes tones change and become a different frequency. This change is very clear. Sometimes the ears are blocked by the tones sometimes the ear is open and frequency change. That’s what I remember for now.

The Start

It started when I was still very young, about 15 in Burma. I read a meditation article and it said the ringing can appear when the concentration becomes stronger. And soon I noticed it happened to me. It never left me ever since.

Emotion

First I didn’t feel bad about it. However, sometimes later it became something serious and made me stressed. I felt like being imprisoned. It was still bearable. It lasted until I accepted it and not resisting anymore. I became to accept it because I had no choice but to calm my mind and control it not to feel too bad. Now understand the two conditions of mind and I try not to let go of my mind to the wrong side.  

Physical Symptom

I always feel my ears are blocked. I have to pick the ear web very often. When I was young, my ears were not oily. I saw my friend ear oily and I thought it might be good and it became to happen to me. I was told to pick the ear web when I was young. I did it often and even hurt my ears. Water got into the ears often. It seems the shape of the ears is not water proof. Actually I wash my head everyday and this could be the case causing water to get in. I think my hair and ears are naturally oily.

Its Effect in My Life

Often I lose concentration when I am listening to something because I am hearing the hum and what I’m listening to appear unclear. People sometimes asked me to learn to listen because I appeared not listening. Yes, I was not listening properly because I couldn’t hear properly. It’s more disturbing when answering the phone. But I can still hear though as the hum is only distracting. As I don’t listen much, I became to speak more and think more. And now I usually write my ideas down.

As Meditation Object

I sometimes listen to the hum. The more attention I pay to it, the louder it becomes. And it is also enjoyable. I think it’s good to listen to it and use it for a good reason. 

As I can't stop hearing it, now I'm hearing it in my left ear. When the environment is quiet, I can hear hum in both ears. Expensive experience.  

The Essence Of Reality

What is reality?

If mathematicians can describe everything in mathematical equations, they should try on reality. If everything is just physical, reality should be too.

But is it? How is it? What substances are made to perform as reality through out universe uniformly? Can this kind of physically constructed reality exist – in you, in me, in education, in science, in delusion…? Can reality be the same to all of these things both life and non-life?

If something cannot be defined or described in mathematics, or in physical structure, doesn’t it exist in reality as reality? Can’t it exist? Why can’t it exist?

Does reality exist? Why real and why not? Define that “reality” in scientific terms and phenomena, please!

Is the universe solely physical? Yes or no?

Doesn’t abstractness exist? Is abstractness also physical, as physical as atoms and elements, the colours of stars, the colours of the world, the colours of life and in physical world?

[Love is made of chemicals they say! But they never put these chemicals into a glass and said this is love!!! Why didn’t they ever do it? Because it will sound very silly and unscientific! But they keep saying love is chemicals!!! Then if two people don’t fall in love, shouldn’t they take such chemicals in a tablet form? If love is just chemicals, all problems of love affairs should have been solved long ago!!! Why don’t they do it? That will make big bucks, if love is really chemicals! They say so what they don’t believe and bother to prove.]

Must reality be physical to be in existence?

If reality needs to exist, does it need becoming physical matter? Do some matters compose reality? As matters vary, do different compositions of different matters make different realities? Hence my reality is different from others’ realities, including the universal reality?

So is it reality to you this (or that) way – only physical?

Reality is abstract. Thus, existence and life are abstract. Physical world is also abstract. And humanity is abstract in all available definitions. Why? The reason is everything seems to be abstract that even physical matters only exist with abstract as their essence. That’s the essence of reality in my view.

The reality is nobody seemed to have known the reason of an apple falling. Whence the theory is everything has not existed, it’s not fair to seek mathematical explanation or description of reality. Reality is right in front of everyone. It’s both inside and outside mind. It’s inside matters and outside matters. Reality is everything. Reality is abstract because it’s everything.

The theory of everything is reality. It cannot be described in words or images or in mathematical equations. No artists will be able to create reality. No chemists will find a way to put the chemicals to create reality. No photographers will be able to take a picture of reality. Reality is just to be known as it is. It’s the universe, the unity, the void and the infinity. It’s everything observable. Reality is everything that exists.

So somehow the existence of abstractness is not abstract at all but substantially realistic. Reality is thus abstract and can be explained in its abstractness only. As being abstract, reality is not composed and thus, is not limited to the idea of amount. Reality is unity and singularity without limit. That is infinity. Reality and infinity are one and the same. That’s how reality can exist everywhere at the same time and is not affected by local observance. Does this contradict Quantum Mechanics? I think not. I guess QM have found out how larger objects are also abstract – the projection of mind and how matters are just abstractness as their reality. Heat, cold, stiffness, softness, stickiness, binding forces, … and gravity are just abstract and as simple as just that.

It’s delusion whenever reality is not understood.

The reality of delusion is it veils the view, blindfolds the eyes, misinform the thought and veers away from reality.

Therefore, delusion is as powerful as reality to humans and other living organisms. For that good reason, once reality is found, and delusion is abandoned behind, whoever found it can become on top of the existence. And for the same reason, once reality is abandoned, and delusion is crowned, whoever lost the sense of reality can find themselves at the bottom of existence.

It’s important for us to know the reality of delusion. Education must be educating everyone about the reality of delusion. The purpose of education should be to educate about delusion and how to handle it. Let everyone become a critical thinker. The difference between human and other species is human can understand the reality of delusion.

As being invisible, colourless, shapeless, formless, scentless and tasteless, reality can be understood only by the mind. Only an abstract can understands abstractness. That’s how mind can know education. That’s how education is important to emphasize on abstractness of reality and reality of reality. That’s the reality we shouldn’t overlook.

[Reality is abstract. Abstractness is a reality. A reality is mind. Mind affects matters to behave such a way. Quantum Mechanics will be very interesting. Very interesting will be how the world be changed with new ideology in science. Science will be abstract again as it has been all along. Science of abstractness will lead the world to a better future. Better future will be with moral and the abstract side of cause and effect.]

What’s real?

The existence of abstractness is reality. The existence of physicality is abstract. Physicality is reality in its own terms and in its own right. Both abstractness and physicality are reality. The essences of them are reality but abstract. Strictly abstract!

And what’s not real? Guess!!!

Ideas! Ideas are not real. They can never become real. Concepts are not real and will never become reality. Dreams are not real. They cannot be turned into reality. Arguments are never real because of ideas, concept and argument itself. These are just ideological projections but unreal. They don’t exist outside ideological universe.

Is our universe real? Is it the existence outside the ideological universe? QM will let us know. Actually “You and I do not exist” physically because the smallest particles are formed by ideological projection. What we can feel as physicality with five senses is conditioned by our mind which is abstract. You’re your projection and your Schrödinger's cat; and I’m the projection of mine my Schrödinger's cat. We communicate with five senses plus thought formed in mind. We can communicate with one another physically because physicality is the means to communicate. Physicality is the connection used for mind to mind communication. Physicality is infrastructure set up by the mind, senses are the information travelling along the infrastructure and you and me (we are) just our minds – strictly mental only. The body is simply the infrastructure. But consciousness itself is not constant – sometimes it exists and sometimes it doesn’t. Where from it comes and how does it reappear? This is how it is hard to understand and all are seen as physical – whence physicality is conditioned by consciousness whenever it is present.

Mind is consciousness and everything mind is just feeling. When there is feeling, there is consciousness and vice versa. The reality is abstract – strictly abstract, and simply mental only. Reality doesn’t exist in physical form but in abstract form of physicality in terms of feeling when sensed by consciousness: softness, hardness, solidness, cold, heat, stickiness, wetness, dryness, etc.  (A video about consciousness)

A thing that doesn’t exist in reality has its truth as unreality – but it exists as projection of mind and is built with idea and concept as imagination. The reality that is made and formed is conditioned reality but it’s not reality that is real; it’s only the reality of conditioned reality. Reality and the conditioned reality are not the same. Conditioned reality is any or all of idea, concept, thought, dream as projection of the mind. Conditioned reality is the projected existence whence reality is the core – like the light to fire. The reality of projected reality is the light of the fire as fire exists on the fuel. Reality is the core that cannot be broken down any further. Conditioned reality is merely perception that is the projection constructed with idea, concept, thought and memorized information.

The truth or a truth of a thing is its reality or its essence. The truth of abstractness is it’s abstract and non-physical. The truth of reality is reality itself. Reality cannot be created, nor destroyed. Reality is just reality, not made and not formed.

Ego: what is ego?

Pain: what is pain?

In physical world, what is ego and pain as the reality of existence?

Ego is consciousness, feeling and sensation. An unconscious mind doesn’t show the sign of ego. Numbness doesn’t show the sign of sensation and consciousness. If the whole body is numb from injury or drug effect, even if the brain is functioning, there cannot be any sign of consciousness – in my opinion – thus, the brain might looks completely dead even if the person/animal is still alive somehow; however, internal vital organs should still be working though. When near waking up moment, sometimes some people felt they couldn’t move their limbs or other body parts– as though they were aware of their environment in half dreamy state. I wonder how the brain might look like during a moment like this. It might be active but the parts which control sensation and physical activity other than the heart and other vital organs might be inactive to cause such inability for movement.

Pain needs ego, consciousness and sensation to become into existence. A dead body doesn’t feel pain as it has no consciousness for sensation and ego. Ego is the ground for pain to sprout and grow on. Pain is sensation. In Buddhist ideology, egoless person doesn’t mentally suffer although physical pain level is unbearable to ordinary people with egos.

How should I explain evolution in terms of reality?

I have a question.

Why hasn’t how non-life matters becoming life matters been proven?

1. Scientists know how early stage of a planet might look like. The possibility appearance of early stage earth has been theorized.
2. How life might appear from non-life materials has been theorized. But no laboratory tests ever resulted in proving this theory of evolution.
3. If the way scientists think how the early stage of earth looked like, they should recreate it in laboratory. After that, they should demonstrate how life emerged from non-life materials.
4. We should want proof. As long as how life began is not solved, macroevolution has not become a reality but only a myth, merely a theory. Then it’s not right to claim evolution is the only truth whence its truth, its essence, is not yet found.
5. Agree with observable changes occur all the time as microevolution in which a species changes form, shape, size, colour, lifestyle, habitat and lifespan.
6. Yet macroevolution cannot be found in microevolution because that species doesn’t become a different species – i.e. moneys become only different monkeys, apes only become different type of apes, etc and as a conclusion, humans only become humans in different ethnicity or race.
7. Most importantly, a good stage by stage explanation is needed on how the earliest life form emerged from non-life form even if this scenario is not possible to be repeated in the laboratory. But why is it impossible? Because life didn’t come from non-life. If it did, it’s against the law of QM - imho. 

The Meaning of Disappearing Electrons

Now we know energy is no permanent. It can disappear from existence into nothing. It can be renewed perhaps and once it's born, it ages and dies later - in a friction of a second. That's the reason why electrons are disappearing just like us. As we're made from disappearing particles, the reason of death is within our body.



This video explains the electron are disappearing as a reason for parallel universe. But I don't want to go that path. Instead I want things simpler based on observable fact - changing world. I like to see changing as the factor of disappearing electrons and they have everything to do with the natural course of aging and death.

Then is the assumption "energy cannot be created or destroyed" wrong? I don't know. But the fact is electrons are disappearing. If that fact must lead to creating another theory, the theory of parallel universe, I guess there would never become the end of creating new theories for the universe.

In my view, infinity doesn't have to have more complex structures than what we have known so far. Galaxies: they must be just everywhere spreading in the infinite universe. Certainly the disappearing of electrons does raise a question about the big bang theory - at least. The big crunch is also questionable because of this fact - disappearing electrons.

Disappearing electrons suggest, new electrons are coming out of nothing or something yet to be known. At least that something must be replacing the electrons (or renewing them). Otherwise, someone will have to calculate the rate of electron disappearance out of existing universe.

The disappearing electrons also reminds me about "leaky universe" in which energy is leaking and consumed by the process of running this vast universe constantly.

Here Quantum Mechanics come in - in which how mind or consciousness is the factor that determines or changes the world at least at quantum level. Holographic World view might be a fact; yet to run it, needs energy produced by consciousness.

Hypocrisy

It’s a very common word. It’s been defined as it’s been used in many ways. But I think it needs explained once again because I think I have slightly different views. I rather give it simple supplementary explanation.

Once I learned about three common hypocrisies:

1.      Aging: everyone is a subject of aging and gradually getting older and certainly has become or will become an old person – the closer to death, the less physical beauty. By knowing the fact, whether with negligence or denial, if someone loathes an old person, then this is hypocrisy.

2.      Illness: it’s same as above. Everyone is a subject of illness and pain. Whether getting a severe disease or a simple headache or even lighter illness such as skin rush or just mosquito bite, all living things are equal for this reason. By knowing this fact, whether by negligence or denial, if a person loathes an ill person, this is also hypocrisy.

3.      Death: everyone fears of pain. The reality is death is also a pain. We’re all going to die one day – even if young now. Yet some people tend to loathe the dead body. This is also hypocrisy if not comparing with one’s own body and loathing it also. We know a living body keeps dying every moment and the hair, the finger nails, toe nails, dead skin, fat (or oil), and all sort of evidences are always indicating the truth.

These three are from the Buddha Himself. Maybe I’ve missed some information which is also important. Perhaps there is the forth: dirtiness caused by wastes coming out of the body. But I rather give my own points of view based on what I’ve learned so far.

We cannot be free from hypocrisy because of emotions – the human nature of psychology. Greed, anger, delusion, pride and jealousy are the very reasons because they make us to overlook ourselves.

Someone becomes greedy because of something valuable. Otherwise, that person would be normal – although that person has not abandoned greed completely. That is the way how greed appears, comes out of its domain, and does its activity. But we, with little ignorance, know greed is bad and will definitely oppose others for their greed yet we can become greedy. At the moment when greed is present, a person is hypocrite. 

Anger, pride and ignorance appear, come out of their own domains, and do their activities – just that way too. But we know, with little ignorance, how bad anger is. When we get angry, we’re both angry and hypocrite.

Ignorance is the very reality we cannot avoid. Nobody can know everything when we do something. Ignorance itself doesn’t make us hypocrite directly but it supports greed, anger, pride and jealousy and so there is hypocrisy.

All conscious living organisms are not free from these realities. If we get greedy or angry and do not dislike ourselves and correct our minds, that is a practice of hypocrisy.

Here jealousy and envy are also hypocrisy. They are based on selfishness so they’re selfish hypocrisy – sounding much worse. More than that, covetousness is a real problem as it’s about wanting others’ properties – any or all of money, wealth, position, love, just anything at all. Here healthy competition itself falls into this category as raising/fixing the price to make bigger profit can be immoral covetousness.

So is there anything left which is not hypocrisy? Of course just remove the selfishness and delusion; anything can be done without hypocrisy this way. Whatever action taken from the self perspective, like I do it, I want it, etc. can be tainted with hypocrisy because immoral self-interest could be there; otherwise it’s moral and not hypocrisy.

Fire burns because it gets fuel. Material things are fuel for greed, anger, pride, jealousy and ignorance. If someone doesn’t consider these realities and loathe others for their greed, anger, pride, jealousy and ignorance, then that’s hypocrisy. When one has yet to have abandoned these hypocrisies, disliking others for having any hypocrisy, one is obviously hypocrite.

Why should a person who has greed of his/her own criticise someone else for having/showing greed? Why can a person criticise others’ anger, pride, jealousy and ignorance?

We want to be intelligent, smart, have everything, famous, loved, cared, looked after, followed, safe, moral, satisfied, pleased, happy, want to be treated well and nicely, and all sort of good quality of life are wanted. Why can one harbour such bad emotions if one is not totally lacking self-control and hopelessly ignorant?

Criticising, judging others, and not criticising and judging oneself, it’s a way of practicing hypocrisy. But it’s better to judge and analyse oneself because one can improve oneself this way.

But we should pardon the nature of politics because we need a peaceful society in which political activities must exist healthily. If politicians have the condition to practice their best and serving the common interests, then what will we say?- it’s what we actually want as a society.

If a person practices hypocrisy willingly than that person is immoral. It’s hard to control the mind but it’s good to have not sped and crushed. We cannot expect animals and other organisms to practice morality. But as intelligent beings, we humans can know and have conscience. It’s always great to increase conscience.

Ignorance is actually the predominant factor of all existence and occurrence. The dark shadow of ignorance casting by all individual living organisms is so vast that we have to live in the dark most of the time. This way we actually affect one another with borrowed ideas. That shadow is the great shadow of life. We each casts a little shadow and make it big blanketing black shadow of oneness so fearsome that it engulfs everyone. That’s actually our own contribution as a global society of the world. Whatever we do, act, say... is not free from our ignorance – meaning we’re not perfect and our actions cannot be perfect ideologically even when the action is the only right thing to do; still we do it with delusion more or less. The contribution of our ignorance we make to one another is what we actually have in common. Not all of us are just like that though. Sometimes sages come and shine the light of truth. Whenever such a sage appears, we rather not miss his/her teachings.